4 Cases When a Musical Instrument is a Bad Gift

1. Toy

Every parent will confirm this. There’s no worse physical torture than stepping on a Lego brick, except maybe listening to the awful sounds coming from "musical" toys – whether it's the electronic screeches built into stuffed animals, dolls or toy cars, or children’s imitations of musical instruments – those plastic pianos with a million demo songs can really test a parent’s patience.

A special category here is the so-called "real" musical instruments, only in a cheerful, child-friendly version. The brightly coloured, more buzzing than playing ukuleles, falsely tuned xylophones or screaming soprano recorders make you want to throw them out the window, whether or not you have a musical ear. Often, families end up establishing a strict embargo on noisy toys, all for the sake of preserving the mental health of the parents.

And if you buy a real, full-fledged musical instrument as a toy, even if you don’t know if the gift will be used, it might end up as the next point.

2. Decoration

"I bought you a guitar because it would look good on you." It’s hard to find a more superficial reason to buy someone a musical instrument as a gift. Yes, it’s true that many people originally started playing because it looked good, or more specifically, "it was a way to attract girls/guys," and then they became great musicians. Let’s face it, musical instruments are, among other things, aesthetic objects. But if you buy a costly guitar for someone who doesn’t have a musical ear and no real passion for music (and won’t even appreciate it as an investment), the instrument will most likely end up abandoned in a corner.

Moreover, for the surrounding musicians, it becomes almost a physical trauma. Just imagine: you visit someone who knows nothing about music, and as decoration in their room sits an instrument that you would travel the world for. (Especially if it's a piano, and they’ve put flower pots, vases and drinks on it.) While you’re picking your jaw off the floor, your musically-loving heart is sinking with sadness and envy. Admit it, have you ever tried to persuade such a friend to sell you their underappreciated musical artefact?

3. A surprise at any cost

This is a bit of a specific point because there’s nothing wrong with the musical instrument itself as a gift, but the execution falls short. Somewhere, you may have casually mentioned that you wanted a guitar, and boom – next Christmas, you receive an unpleasant surprise (which you can only comment on with a "Thanks, Dad..."), one that reminds you of a guitar but is not something you would ever buy for yourself. It’s nice that someone from your circle heard your wish and wanted to make you happy, but it’s hard to apply the saying "don't look a gift horse in the mouth" when a much-wanted instrument is just sitting there, unwanted, worth thousands of dollars. Why didn’t they at least ask you what exactly guitar you wanted? Such a surprise at all costs only causes emotional scars on both sides.

Do you remember that episode of Friends when Rachel reveals that she returns every gift she gets and instead buys something she actually wants? This is that case. Next time, make sure to be specific about your musical wish – or at least ask for a receipt and don’t be afraid to exchange the gift. The person themselves best buys some gifts.

4. Satisfying your own ambitions

This is probably the worst reason why people buy musical instruments for others. It’s a bit like giving unsolicited advice. Without the recipient asking for it (or maybe, in a weak moment, they mentioned something like, "I’d love to play bass because it’s cool"), you gift them an instrument according to your best judgment – and expect them to shower you with gratitude and for you to be able to honour them in the mosh pit under the stage in a few months. It’s easy to meddle in other people’s lives, right?

More often than not, it’s about wanting to see someone else experience the success you never dared to imagine for yourself or that you once had the potential for, but fate mysteriously steered you off course. This is often the case with ambitious parents who, in good faith, buy their child a musical instrument almost as soon as they are born and hope that, since they couldn’t fulfil their own musical dreams, the next generation will make up for it. But as they say these days: "Not even close."

So, what about you? Have you ever received or given a musical instrument as a gift, and it turned out to be a total flop? Share your stories in the comments below on Facebook.