Songs Written with a Machete #8: Tony's Son and His Fruit
I spent eighteen months of my three-year South American adventure in the Colombian wilderness, in a mountain village near the infamous Medellín. As a bluesman, I was impressed by local songs, whose lyrics would wake up even Oblomov from his lethargy. I decided to translate the juiciest pieces and bring them to you in the series Songs Written with a Machete.
In the village where I lived, there was a stray dog the size of a dachshund that amazed everyone, because his genitals were so huge that they earned him the nickname Penycchio. The pun containing the Spanish word for penis was invented by a local vet who took the dog in.
Sexuality is ubiquitous in Colombia. Even in church, the local beauties may have their lush curls covered by a scarf, but their cleavage as deep as the Mariana Trench must make the priests in the confessionals blush. When a man greets a local beauty shortly and without compliments, she gets offended and begins to gossip about him, saying that "he must be castrated".
One of the most famous songs from the mid-1970s, "El Hijo de Toño", its lyrics still inspire smiles as well as genuine envy.
Tony's Son
When Toño became a widower, he was left with a male child
with a very big strawberry tree and quite a lot of guavas
The girls all want to look at Toñilitas,
to rub his bellybutton, to touch his guavas (of course)
and they follow him around,
they all want to touch him and speak to him tenderly.
"Toñilas, come here."
"Oh, I'll give you something."
"Ay!", says Estela.
"Ay", Juana and Carmen Rosa.
They say that he is a tiger's son, he looks like a tiger,
but Toñilas came out really well-endowed.
They say that he is a tiger's son, he looks like a tiger,
but Toñilas came out really well-endowed.
And the girls in the neighbourhood are all amazed,
when Toñilas grows up, what will the strawberry tree be like?
And the girls follow Toñilas around,
they all want to touch him and speak to him tenderly.
"Toñilas, come here."
"Oh, I'll give you something."
"Ay!", says Estela.
"Ay", Juana and Carmen Rosa.
They say that he is a tiger's son, he looks like a tiger,
but Toñilas came out really well-endowed.
They say that he is a tiger's son, he looks like a tiger,
but Toñilas came out really well-endowed.
No wonder the song was used in the Narcos series...
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