Pedalboard Gems #12: SMG Cock Blocker

Naturally, the more distortion we use, the higher the probability of various unwanted sounds (hum, noise, hiss and so on). And naturally, we don't want that (except for controlled feedback). For many years, the uncrowned king of this "closing" discipline was the rack unit Rocktron Hush. The role of the industry-standard—as is its wont—was taken by Boss and its NS-2 Noise Suppressor. The stagnant waters of "gating" were then stirred up a bit by ISP with their Decimator and after that nothing much happened.

But then came the explosion of modern metal styles played on high-gain and packed with complicated choppy riffs, where the aforementioned old hands suddenly stopped keeping up. I don't know how true this story is (I didn't find the video), but a sound engineer told me that when the pioneering Meshuggah used to record, the guitarist was synchronised with an assistant with a piece of soft foam who muffled undesirable sounds during those complex chops. If you listen to a nice Meshuggah song, you might think that analysing those riffs would be some math students' dream job;)

From sexist presets to popularity

The exciting story of the new noise gate was initiated by a petition against TC Electronic, organized by an active female musician who was offended by the explicit name of an artist preset in the Toneprint app. The scandal received ample media coverage, which was surely a marketing ploy, as the Steel Panther in question revel in sexist controversies. Nevertheless, TC Electronic relented and withdrew the preset from the offer. The incriminated title, however, returned with even more force in the form of a highly successful pedal, which sold out almost immediately and which many YouTubers used to speak out about censorship, political correctness, limits of humour and other pressing issues of the democratic world.

The designer of this pink pedal was approached by the notoriously outspoken YouTuber Glenn Fricker who wished to shout out to the world how he too was "offended" by this product. After some exchange, Fricker commissioned Tony Salva (Salvation Audio, KHDK) to design a novel noise gate, with a name that certainly wouldn't be mistaken for nonsexist.  That's how the Cock Blocker was born and later introduced to the broadest spectrum of YouTubers by the trademark Spectre Media Group (SMG). Dan Kurz took on the visual design and his red cockerel motif added an extra layer of double entendre.

Cock Blocker and its (secret) qualities

However potent the marketing games were, they would soon fizzle out without a quality product. The main asset of this fully analogue dual noise gate is the detection of the clean signal from the guitar. That places the Cock blocker at the very beginning of the chain, unlike most others. It evaluates far more accurately whether the guitar is actually playing and closes accordingly—but after the distortion! Thus, it can eliminate noise generated in the distortion circuits. Thanks to this clever combination, it closes instantly and at lightning speed, therefore it doesn't struggle even with dense, choppy riffs, where older products are likely to completely burn out. That makes the SMG Cock Blocker the perfect noise gateway not only for modern metalheads and djentlemen.

"So simple to use even bass players can get it!" shouts Mr. Fricker. Let's overlook the fact that bassists usually don't need a noise gate at all. A loud promo show "must go on". A single potentiometer with a stylish red knob in the shape of a chicken head (or in this case, rather a cock head) sets the threshold (the volume level at which it starts to close) and that's it.

The wiring isn't exactly the trivial In/Out, but there is a QR code in the manual that will take you to a video where Glenn will show and explain exactly how to do it. After unscrewing the back cover, an attentive user will not only encounter the familiar ground lift, but also a secret trimmer!

At least that's how they presented it on the GearGods YouTube channel, but the truth is a bit more prosaic. The Cock Blocker was selling so well and fast that Glenn didn't even need to explain that the internal trimmer is actually a boost with the ability to adjust the volume of the box when engaged, which can be an advantage for some effects loops. However, like the ground lift, this feature can be useful in rare special cases. You'll find plenty of reviews and demos on YouTube, often with a proper dose of politically incorrect humour from Glenn himself or another metal axeman, Ola Englund.

Plugin version

Cock Blocker is also available as an equally well-functioning VST plugin, with significantly extended setup options. This little red cockerel is thus successfully penetrating into other market segments. In its physical form, it is my very first noise gate, which I decided to buy after frequent effects tests. Some of them did not handle my home electricity supply spiced up by a laptop display emitting who knows what kind of waves. I even had to sell one otherwise excellent distorter because it was humming completely out of control. The new owner didn't notice anything like that. Now I can react better to such situations.

Try the Cock Blocker, maybe you will comment like my colleague, a long-time tester and expert on all sorts of noise gates: "For a box that doesn't play, it's great! Thanks, I've never had a better noise gate. I use it even for recording."  The box is "Made in Prague" and the talented engineer and our compatriot Tony Salva has many more fascinating stories to tell about orders from various world stars, but more about that next time.